You make me feel like a kid
Your smile, your laugh, your voice makes me feel like a kid
Running into you makes puts me in a rush like a kid on a sugar rush
You mess me up in a good way like a kid getting messed up over his or her favorite toy
You make me feel good
You make me feel uneasy
It's a rush of emotions I can't explain
I feel free, I feel lost
I feel excited, I feel nervous
I feel like a kid
A happy kid
A kid under your power and control
I feel like a kid
I like being a kid...mostly...

Like a Kid

I haven't blogged in a while. Been so busy, I'm loaded with school work. I've got lots to do but I just felt real nice I had to blog about it. I think this is my first blog entry for 2009...pretty cool, considering how I feel right now. I feel like a kid...hehe...I was drinking chocolate milk and I just felt like a kid. I don't know I was recounting my day while I was pouring the milk and then I just smiled and felt happy. I felt like a kid who just got a new toy or something. I can't describe the feeling, it's difficult to explain but I just wanted to blog about it so I'd remember. It was just a real nice feeling.

I went upstairs holding my glass of milk and I looked at my mom and smiled. I think I looked like an excited little kid. My mom asked, "What?" I smiled even wider and said, "Chocolate milk"...pretty weird, hehe...but I was just real happy. And that's when I decided to blog about the whole thing.

I looked at my things and saw Ruff staring at me. I smiled again.

Well, that's about it. Just wanted to memorialize the feeling. I think it's because of Rufus. Rufus makes me feel like a kid. Rufus made me feel like a kid. My Rufus encounter today made me feel like a kid. I hope I won't forget that experience.

Thanks Lord. =)

*** I just remembered while I was taking a shower, another thing that made me happy today was the Spurs' win over the Lakers. I watched the live coverage this morning before going to school. 112-111. =)

It's All Good

I had a good day yesterday at church. At first I didn't want to hear mass with my mom but I eventually decided to since I haven't been spending quality time with God lately. It turned out real great because after days, even weeks of not having a good conversation with Him, I finally had a great time with Him. Then afterwards, I got to try chicken kariman for the first time and then I got my haircut. I was also somewhat productive in the evening, I was able to start my history midterm. I've been feeling a bit pressured and I've been panicking a bit because I have so many things to do, but one thing God told me during our talk was to do my best and He will do the rest. It may be a cliche but it works. Another thing that made me smile yesterday was that I realized how God has made things work out for me (I'll enumerate these later).

Today, my good feeling has continued. I set the goal of finishing my reviewer for my Philo orals on the 6th and I was able to do it (I actually just finished refining it...hehe)...it took a lot food to finish (I would eat everytime I would finish one thesis statement; there were three so after the first I ate Chiz Curls and Pillows, after the second I ate cup noodles and Mini Chips Ahoy, then when I was almost done with the third I was called to dinner and so I had dinner...hehe...I'm gonna get fat because of school, haha...) I feel real accomplished right now because I finished what I set out to do. It reminds me of the reading marathon I accomplished during the 24th. It just amazes me and I think it's just right since I've been a sloth the past few days, just watching TV, DVDs, going out...stuff like that...hehe...

Oh yeah and this blog is an accomplishment too because I've been wanting to blog but I've never found the time to, hehe...

Here's how God has made things work out for me:

1. I feel amazed at how I was able to accomplish stuff for my history midterm in a span of a few days. The interesting thing is that I did not even realize that classes would resume next week. I'm just thankful that I was able to get my butt moving in working on my midterm. I did it without panicking because I didn't realize that Christmas break was almost over.

2. We did not reach St. Thomas Aquinas in Philo so we only had three thesis statements instead of four. Today, I am so thankful that we only had three thesis statements because I think I only had enough brain juice for three.

So there, it all worked out...I'll add to these next time.

That's all for now. I'm off to doing my other errands for the day - funny, it's almost 12 midnight...hehe...I'm pretty hyper right now because of the stuff I accomplished and because tomorrow is relax day...it's New Year's Eve! Good food and bonding time with family...going to the mall with Cha in the afternoon and watching DVDs after.

Thanks Lord... =)\

(Haha, I was so excited to do other things that I forgot to put a title...)

Late Blog: Compilation of Stuff I've Wanted to Blog About

Olympics

I was such an Olympic freak during the last Olympics in Beijing. The TV would always be on an Olympic channel whenever I was home. It didn't really matter what the event was, I just wanted to tune in and I tried to catch whatever I could. I didn't have much of a choice since Sky Cable didn't have Solar Sports anymore and I didn't subscribe to the pay-per-view. The sports I looked forward to were basketball (no duh...), swimming, gymnastics, and the marathons. I disliked it when CS9 or ETC would show boxing matches.

But aside from my Olympic obsession, what was real noteworthy was how I was able to watch the men's basketball gold medal match, a bit of the bronze medal match, and Michael Phelps' final event.

First, let's talk about Michael Phelps. Aside from watching the Olympic events whenever I'd get home or when I'm about to go to bed, I'd tune in to ETC in the morning because they talk about the Olympics. When I heard about Michael Phelps' feat, I really wished that I could watch his final event to see if he would get the Olympic record. I was gonna be content with watching the replay if I would be able to catch it but I got lucky...I was getting my haircut and it just so happened that the parlor I was in had Solar Sports. I knew that Michael Phelps' final event was on that day. Solar Sports was televising the events live and I knew it would be historic to watch that final event...it's always special when you watch something live. I was already done with my haircut, but the event wasn't on yet. They were still showing all the other matches. My mom and Cha were already nagging me to go home but I told them it was real important for me to catch the event live. I'm not too proud of it, but we even got into a bit of an argument. I told them they could go ahead and I'll just take a cab going home because I really wanted to watch that last event. I knew my mom and Cha were getting pretty annoyed with me but I just really wanted to watch. I wasn't completely proud of how I was acting, but sometimes some things are just worth standing up for. I made a wish that day, I prayed that I'd be able to watch that match and I was given the opportunity to do so and I didn't want to let it pass. Fortunately, the match was up next and I was able to catch it. All was good when we got into the car. I was smiling and I was happy. Mom and Cha were laughing and mocking me in the car.

On the day of the men's basketball medal match, we went to Tagaytay Highlands, I forgot why but we did. I knew what time the game would be televised on CS9. While I was playing billiards, they were showing the bronze medal match live. It was already the second or third quarter when I saw it. I watched a little while playing. I was happy Argentina was winning. But I was pretty confident that I'd be able to catch the replay on CS9. Unfortunately, the car broke down on the way home. Of course I started getting pissed because we couldn't decide whether we would get the car fixed or get another ride. If we had decided earlier, I might have been able to catch the game. And so I went on this frenzy, trying to find a way I could watch the game online. I asked Cha to ask her friend to look for a site. I just really wanted to watch the game. I did find a site and I was able to download the bronze medal match. It took about a day to download the whole thing. I was only able to get back to the video and watch it a few days ago...hehe...so the video has been on the desktop for months. But that's not the big story I wanted to tell. I mean, it was cool that I was able to find the video online...I was pretty bummed that I wasn't able to get a hold of the women's medal match and the men's gold medal match. I just read an article about the women's matches (specifically the bronze medal one because I was rooting for Russia...Becky Hammon!!!) and I was glad that the Russians won. I was able to catch the women's gold medal match one time on TV. CS9 was replaying Olympic games. I wasn't too interested in it anymore though, I knew the U.S. won and I really wished that Russia made it to the gold medal match instead.

Anyway, going back...here's the big adventure. I was real desperate to watch the men's gold medal match. I knew BTV was showing the games and I really wished we had BTV back then (it doesn't matter though, we have it now and I'm glad). I went to BTV's website to check their schedules. I was bummed that I wouldn't be able to watch the women's games but I saw that I could catch the men's gold medal match the following day. I asked Cha if we could go to her house the following day just to watch and she said yeah. I forgot what we did before we went to her house, but anyway, the remarkable thing was that I endured a very long jeepney ride just to get to her place. During the jeepney ride, Cha and I were talking and I smiled as I told her, "Man, what I would do for basketball..." I was just fascinated. I am such a basketball freak. And really, when there is something I want, I'd do almost anything to get it.

We were a bit late for the game because it was traffic but I was happy when I got to watch it. Cha's dad even fed us kalderetang baka, so I was eating while watching. After the game, we went home. I was satisfied. While watching, I kept telling Cha I wished we had BTV...I missed the channel so much. At least we have it now. =)

Clark and Lana

Here's another one of my weird obsessions...Clark Kent and Lana Lang...or Lana Lang-Kent to me. I don't know what's with them..I have my theories, but man, I just love them and they affect me so much.

I've felt depressed for a couple of days after watching that episode where Clark proposes to Lana and Lana accepts but ends up dying because of Lex. Clark asks for Jor-El's help and he goes back in time, doesn't propose to Lana, and they end up breaking up. I was so upset with Clark, he could have proposed again but warned Lana...blah blah blah...that's just one example of how Smallville affects me.

I've felt depressed for weeks about the two and I still do sometimes...hehe...but I just remember the time when I was on a high for a couple of weeks because of one fic I read. I found a sanctuary as a Clana fan in Sweet. I remember spending an entire day or weekend just reading fics. Yup, I went on another one of my crazes. Ask Cha, I couldn't stop saying "Clark and Lana" with matching weird, dreamy face, and goofy smile for weeks...I even wrote it down on a tissue paper while we were eating in The Old Spaghetti House. I was really on a high during those weeks, I'd smile everytime I would hear "You and Me" by Lifehouse (the song they danced to during prom). I'd think of the couple whenever I would hear a love song and I wouldn't even feel pain when I'd hear "You're Beautiful" by James Blunt (the song that played in the background during that dreaded episode when Clark proposed).

One of the things I realized during that week was that Clark and Lana were fictional characters. Their story was written by someone. They were figments of someone's imagination. Because their story was written by someone, it does not mean that whatever that person writes is final because it is a story...you imagine it. If Smallville writers could write stories and decide their outcomes, so could I and in my story Clark and Lana end up together.

When I realized this, I felt free. Of course, it doesn't change the fact that I still do get sad at times when I think about how their story ends in Smallville. But it's just a story. I can write my own and I can decide how it ends. I still wish they'd end up together in Smallville...but...I guess you can't get everything you want. I have my fics to cheer me up and I've read some awesome post-Requiem fics and I'm writing my own. (I felt down for a few days/weeks after Lana's final episode, felt better after I read some fics).

Say what you want to say, but Clark and Lana's love goes on forever...it's eternal.
Tom Welling and Kristin Kreuk have done such an amazing job. I don't think I would've been touched by Clark and Lana's story if other actors played the part.


SD day meet (the one with the higad; the day I told him about blink)

I've had some pretty awesome SD sessions with Bro. Martin, but there was this one time where I felt so great afterwards....so happy...so light...it was the day I told him about blink. I have to say, after that talk, I felt free. I was not a bad person and it was okay. I really wished I was able to blog during that day but things came up.

I was just so happy that on my way back from the Loyola House of Studies, I was smiling, I enjoyed my walk and I even told myself and God (I was kinda talking to Him on my way back) that even if a higad would fall on me, I wouldn't mind...(I told God I was kinda kidding, I wouldn't want a higad to fall on me...but I was just so happy...I usually crack jokes with Him when I'm feeling real good). I think I even texted my friends just to tell them I was happy. I think I texted Ai and told her I remembered her when I passed by the sick leaves...hehe...

I wish I could say more about that day and that I could remember some of the things, quotable quotes, that popped into my head during that walk...but I can't. I just remember the feeling and it was a real great feeling...the kind that makes me want to jump up and down...hehe... =p


Bad day - argue with dad in Megamall about receipt

Although it wasn't a very good experience, I found that day quite memorable. It was the first time in a long time that I got into an argument/fight with my dad. I was upset because he lost my Zen's receipt, which I needed for warranty purposes. I was being a bit pushy about asking his friend to look for it and he was missing the point why the receipt was important to me. I just got real annoyed that he was dismissing me and I was stressing him out. We didn't talk for a day or two, I think...or I think I said sorry that evening or the following day.

One of the things I realized after the fight was that my dad and I are both stubborn...hehe...I told Cha that. Looking back, I think that fight showed me that my dad and I are getting pretty close. We fought and then we made up afterwards.


Day at the embassy - bonding with Kaye. Math problem and drawings. Dad funny umbrella.

The day that we got our U.S. Visa was a pretty memorable day. My sister and I got to bond while waiting...because it was a very long wait. We chatted, something we hadn't done in a long time. I missed talking with Kaye and I had forgotten how fun it was talking to her...there are certain things that only her and I understand.

When we got real bored...this was when we were waiting for our interview...I talked her into solving a math problem with me. We tried computing how much longer we would have to wait given the number of counters, the clients left to be served, and the time it took for each person to be interviewed. We made some algebraic representations. Unfortunately, we realized after a while that we simply did not have enough data and so we ended up doodling. One of her doodles was the aerial view of Batman, which looked like a fried egg...hehe...I scanned the piece of paper we doodled in, it's posted in my Multiply site. The other memorable thing during the wait was my dad playing with the umbrella. While Kei and I were busy entertaining ourselves, I guess he tried to entertain himself by playing with the umbrella. He was moving the umbrella around, like drawing circles or writing something on the floor. It was a pretty funny and fascinating site, Kei and I laughed when we saw him...hehe...

The interview went well. We got our visas. My dad had a scary moment though, he saw one of his "enemies" while we were being interviewed and so he got nervous. He kept telling us about it afterwards. After the whole thing, dad brought us to school. Kei first then me. We bought Fillet O' Fish sandwiches in McDonald's for lunch. It was pretty traffic on the way back to ADMU. I fell asleep in the car. I was kinda late for my first class. I told Sir Siojo the reason why I was late afterwards.

God makes thing work out. Check cp about was panicking but He made it okay. Philo orals too, only three thesis statements. Histo was able to do stuff, didn't even know that school was coming up already.

December 19, 2008
I don't really remember this much but I wrote in my cellphone that I was panicking because I was late and I had stuff to do. I prayed that I wouldn't be late. Fortunately, things worked out. I wasn't late because it was a free cut. I think this was the last day of classes before Christmas break. I was bringing a lot of things, gifts actually, and I had some stuff to deliver (ice cream puff orders I think). I was really panicking because I had to deliver the stuff. I think I planned on delivering them before class but I was running late and so I was worrying...I prayed. Then I was so relieved when I found out that our teacher decided to have a free cut.

Christmas break 2008
After I finished preparing for my Ph103 midterm exams, I was so thankful that there were only three thesis statements instead of the original four because I didn't think I had enough energy or brain juice to handle four. I just remember feeling real thankful that day and I felt like things were working out.

During the break, one of the things I was able to accomplish was my photographic recording of Paco Park for my Hi198.7 midterm project. I was also able to do a big chunk of the paper. I didn't realize I was accomplishing all of those during the break and so I was thankful when I realized that I did. The thing was, I didn't realize that classes were about to resume already and so I was pretty fascinated and real thankful for the whole thing.

ADDITION TO STUFF I WANT TO REMEMBER:

• It was nice how everytime I needed to ask a question for Ph104, there was always a free PC I could use (I was reviewing for LT#2).

ADDITION TO MA MOMENTS

• "Ay talaga" - when we ate in Shylin, ma mocked me...I said "Ay talaga" and she repeated it...hehe...

MOM MOMENT

• "Here lives the alcohol magnate" - I forgot when this happened but there was one time when mom said this while she was going to my bed or something...hehe...

• There was also this other time when she sat on my bed, but before she sat, she fixed the blanket first so she would sit on it instead of sitting on my sheets. I just found it cute. She knew I didn't like people sitting on my sheets unless they've taken a bath and are "clean".
  

There are a couple of other things I wanted to blog about but I never found the time and now I can't remember them so that sucks...Just felt like saying it though, at least somehow I'm commemorating it..hehe..

I Just Remembered

I said I would blog about this last Thursday but I was unable to because I foolishly "broke" my laptop that evening....might as well tell that story...I'm incredibly O.C. so I was cleaning my laptop similar to how I've been cleaning it the past few weeks, with a special no-scratch cloth and an appliance cleaner. While I was pouring the appliance cleaner, I either spilled some over my laptop or I put too much and I wet my keyboard while wiping it....when I opened my laptop to start working, my keyboard wouldn't function properly, the stuff that came out on screen did not correspond to the key that I would press. It even went all funky like when I would press B, B! would come out or when I would press S "TRF" would come out then the caps lock function would work inversely. I had a problem with clicking as well, multiple things would be selected whenever I clicked a single icon...well you get the picture...I got so sad and felt so stupid. I swore I would never clean my laptop again. I brought it to Megamall the following day to get it checked and they recommended that I go to the HP service center in Buendia. I made plans to go there last Monday but then my laptop miraculously resurrected and started working fine again so here I am happily typing...hehe..

Anyway, back to my real purpose. I felt happy/fascinated that Thursday (before I broke my laptop of course), my classes were straight from 3:00-7:30. I was in school past 12 as usual. I forgot what I was doing but I wasn't able to buy something I could eat between my classes and I was worrying because I got so hungry the last time I wasn't able to eat anything until after my 7:30 class. I was trying to formulate a plan in my head as to how I can buy food without being late for any of my classes (my 3:00 class was in the Social Science Building, the next one was in Bellarmine, and the last one was in CTC...nice marathon right?)...So there I was walking fast to my 3:00 class, trying real hard to think of a plan...I couldn't be late for my class because we were supposed to have a quiz...then when I entered the room the beadle announced that the teacher couldn't make it to class so we would just continue watching Yojimbo and write a paper about it for next meeting (I wasn't too happy about this but oh well, I passed the paper today...I eventually liked my paper...sort of...) and our quiz was moved next meeting. I just felt happy and I was fascinated because I felt like God resolved my worries. I was getting worried about my stomach...hehe...so after watching Yojimbo I went to the caf and bought a sandwich, which I ate while walking to Bellarmine (I think...or maybe I ate it at the caf..) =p

Hehe...it was just a simple thing but it made me smile that day. I felt like He took care of me. I enjoyed my sandwich...hehe...Thanks Lord.

Cute Sister Moments

Just a quick note before I take a bath and continue working tonight...two funny, cute, and I guess interesting things related to Kaye happened today.

1. We ate lunch together, just the two of us, and we got to talking...something we haven't done in a while (we barely see each other these days), before this we watched a few episodes of FRIENDS together. Anyway, the funny thing was when I was about to leave, I was walking towards her with the intention of kissing her cheek...I usually eat with my mom and grandma and I kiss them before I leave so I guess I got used to it and I was about to do it to Kaye. I was near her already when I realized what I was about to do and I stopped and said I was about to kiss you. Then we both laughed and she said, "I knew it. I felt that you were about to kiss me. I was wondering, what is she doing? Why is she going near me, is she going to wash her hands?" (The sink was behind her..hehe)...We just both laughed. I couldn't stop laughing until I left the house.

2. Kaye didn't have classes today...I was still asleep when I heard my mom waking her up and then she said she didn't have classes today because it was gig day. During lunch, I asked her why she didn't have classes and I heard her say it was gig day. So all day long I thought she didn't have classes because there was a gig in school, it made sense to me...(but I guess I didn't give it much thought..hehe...) When my mom and Cha picked me up, the topic came up again, and I heard gig day again. Then my mom and Cha made me realize that Kaye didn't have classes because it was Taguig day. So they both laughed at me and I told Kaye about it. Then we just all laughed about it during dinner. So I again was the weird one...hehe...

Funny and cute..hehe..gotta take a bath now...still have to polish my paper and review for a quiz... Thanks for the nice day Lord... :)

Just Some Stuff I Wanted to Remember

This won't make much sense, these are things I noted on my cellphone, things that struck me and wanted to remember...I don't remember the details very well, but I'll do what I can..(I want to erase them from my calendar notes on my phone so I can put other reminders, hehe)

September 18, 2008 (I don't think this is the date when these things happened but it's the date I wrote these down. I think I was planning on blogging this day or something and I wanted to note the things I wanted to talk about)

It's going to be okay. Chapel text foster family. Sir Tirol comment. Basketball Olympics.

I think I was referring to our horrible Theo 141 immersion report, although Sir Soler said it was half good, half bad. I just felt so bad because I felt like I didn't do my job well as the leader or the one in charge so I was praying about it in the chapel then I think I received a text message from my immersion family and it just made me feel better. I told them what happened. But the fact that they texted at that moment just gave me the feeling that it was okay; it was alright that our report didn't turn out well.

***

I was talking to Sir Tirol and I somehow ended up mentioning that I went to OBMC for high school and he goes, "You're from OB Montessori?! Really?!" He couldn't believe I was from OB then he says, "Well, you must've been the exception there..."

I just found it pretty flattering and I wanted to remember it. I miss Sir Tirol's classes...He's the best.

***

I don't remember which part about the basketball olympics I was talking about but I have an idea and I will just blog about it next time. Keywords: video, crazy, obsessed, online, desperate, trip to Cha...hehe...

**

September 24, 2008

Nice people surprisingly and inspiringly kind though just met. Ate Myla. Give gift.

I met Ate Myla this sem because of my desperate attempt to get tickets to game 2 of the ADMU-DLSU UAAP championship match. It's amazing how some people are so kind and nice to people they just met. I was able to get three upper B tickets because of her. I got my own ticket for free, she just gave it to me because her sibling didn't want to watch by herself and then she looked for two other tickets for me so that I could have a companion when I watch. I wanted to pay her for my ticket but she didn't want to accept it, she just said "Basta sa akin, mag-enjoy ka lang, masaya na ako. Tama na 'yon." It's inspiring and moving when you meet people like that. It's nice I made a friend.

** Manong from the LS Bookstore is another friend I made because of my obsession with ADMU championship shirts...will try to talk about him next time ***

*** Kuya Jessie's the first friend I made because of UAAP tickets, we go way back to 3rd year 1st sem. He was on leave and that's how I met Ate Myla. ***

**

November 8, 2008

Funny how people, mom, put my blanket on when she went to my bed.

It's funny how people know you and get used to you, almost anticipating your reaction so they do certain things around you. When my mom sat on my bed, she put the cover on first so she wouldn't sit on my bed sheet per se. She knew I was picky about that. I mean, she really fixed the blanket and I just found it cute.

It's synonymous to how Aileen opens her palm and puts her hand out when she asks for alcohol. She knows I don't let other people touch my alcohol and she was surprised when I let her pour the alcohol herself (Tagaytay Steakhouse). And also when she asks, "Pwede ko ba hawakan?" before she touches my things...hehe...

December 3, 2008

Cried today. Felt better. Felt like God is really there for me and it felt nice.

I don't remember why I cried. But I know I was in the chapel and I just did. Then I just felt like God was there for me and I felt better. It felt real nice to be comforted by Him. Thanks Lord. =)

**

December 18, 2008

Sir Soh greeted me. Nice.

(Note: I'm taking a break from writing my Theo paper...hehe)...

I approached Sir Soh after class (I usually do that because I ask questions, makulit ako, I know..hehe...), I asked my question and he answered it. Afterwards, when I was about to leave he said "Merry Christmas," I know it was just a simple and normal thing to do but it was a sincere and heartfelt greeting and it just felt nice, especially coming from a teacher. I smiled (I think) and greeted him Merry Christmas as well. The entire thing made me feel good despite my bothersome cold and I happily fast-walked to my next class (which was all the way in CTC)... =)

Thanks Mr. Soh. Thank you Lord. (Back to writing paper, have to finish it soon...it's past 1 a.m.)